2016

i'm not exactly here to go and reflect upon the past 365 days, or to make any sort of a grand resolution for the next 365 days of my life but i think i've sort of grown a little the past two days, made a few realizations here and there —
1. we are perhaps built of nothing but the inexhaustible fuel of human hope
2. if there is any substitute for love, it's memory
3. but sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free
4. and that means forcing yourself to relinquish and forget, even if it's that one last thing that still belongs to you
5. you have to understand that there's a certain feeling you once had that can never really be replaced
6. you just have to deal with its absence even if you never really get over it
7. because life goes on
8. there are many people who will put you down, try not to be one of them
9. learn to fall asleep before you fall apart
10. and never, ever, ever make homes out of people
11. make as many mistakes as you ever can, & make death proud to take you
12. sometimes the people and things that you dream about wanting
13. are never quite the way they are, or the way you thought them out to be
14. like the way gatsby loved daisy, sometimes i think i love and miss you the exact same way
15. i feel like only through death will we be able to see the realest forms of people, and only then will they realize that it's all too late
16. numb is a blessing
17. "Holocene is the name of a geological era, an epoch if you will, of the last 10,000 years the Earth has existed — all of the world's written history and the entire modern civilization.  It's a song about points in time when you realize you're part of something much bigger.." and i could see for miles, miles, miles
18. i'm so terribly selfish
19. it's not about wanting to feel wanted
20.  i don't know how to love anymore